in my opinion, if you take a ladies' hair away, you take away their covering and they are vulnerable to the world. its the same thing as talking down about someone's hair. why do black women do it? generations ago, they were a supporting generation. if your child was misbehaving, the neighborhood would let the family know and everyone would have a hand in trying to correct the child. this generation, i don't know what to say. we do more harm than good. i include myself, only because i am part of this generation and i am very proud to say that i honestly do not say anything about anyone's hair. its demeaning; its wrong. who knows what sets people off these days. one comment about someone's hair in a hurtful way can even set someone off into a mental or emotional breakdown. thats why we need to watch what we say,
i can remember growing up, i was teased heavily because of my hair. neither my mom nor me could comb my hair. so i went to school looking less than presentable. i was teased everyday until i cut my because of my yearning to an individual. but i can say that my teasing did have something to do with my huge chop. i loved my hair, regardless of how hard it was to come. my classmates didn't appreciate my love. they used everything they could to hurt me about my hair. and they did. i was so hurt. i didn't want to come to school. i didn't have friends. i tried to wear hats everyday. i slicked my hair down with heavy products back into ponytails so that i could conceal my hair from taunts. it never went away. i was even teased from trying to hide it. the cycle never ended.
when my hair did grow, my hair was snatched all day everyday. my black female classmates were trying so hard to see whether my hair was real or not so they can talk about that too, i am guessing. upon my last year in high school, i had the longest african american hair. i didn't expect the comments to stop, but i didn't expect compliments either. and i didn't get any. girls said that because i am bi-racial, of course my hair grew back fast. and they also said that if one their parents were white their hair would grow fast too. i didn't say anything. why? because i first hand know the hurt of being teased and taunted. i am not afriad or ashamed to talk about it now either because i want others to learn from me. you can't accept it, but you can't fight back either.
its sad that these days, black women can't stand to see other black women succeeding, especially if they are doing better. it is a cycle that viciously repeats itself: example - two girls can both have one child a piece. mother A is at home doing nothing progressive and mother B decided to go to school and also get a part time job. mother A would say something like look at her, she know its hard for to go school with a child; she won't even make it. but someone has to remind mother A that she has a child too and at least mother B is trying to make something of herself. also she she could be commended for doing it all with a baby. then mother A has to start making up lies that don't apply to herself to make mother B look bad like, she don't know who the father of child is. who knows whether that statement is true or not. the point is, black women can be devious sometimes.
does it seem like the women that doesn't come from much or didn't make anything out of themselves have the most to say negative about someone? it breaks my heart. i hate that we are not as supportive as the women on hairlista. those women are so nice and these women that we deal with in person on a day to day basis are horrible, lol. but there are black women that are not like that and i give them their credit. thank you for not being a statistic. thank you for being supportive. thank you for caring about you black sisters and thank you for trying to uphold them and not break them and bring them down.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
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2009
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July
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- blogging about my hair, of course
- my emergency relaxer and trim
- its monday, eleven days until my relaxer
- black women versus black women
- Just wanted to blog about past hair experiences
- i have been thinking
- Where's my progress?!
- ACV and true HE LTR Review
- tomorrow i will try ACV for the first time
- Others' Success
- Next day from using HE LTR
- Today I am Seven Weeks Post
- My View on Braids and Weave in General
- My Relaxer History
- Its July! What have I been thinking about?
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- Giving You a Taste of my Hair History
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- Alexis The Counselor
- Counselor by day,student by night. I am a substance abuse therapist who is working hard to continue to rise in this field. I am fanatically in love with beautiful things. Follow me as I work hard during the day and play harder after work.
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