Where Would I Be Without A HHJ???

This is an awesome question. I thought about this in the drive thru line at McDonalds. Weird, right? Anywho, I have been on this journey for almost four years. I have been through ups and downs, as far as products that work and do not work. I am happy to say that I have found a good and secure place in my journey.

But where would I be without these changes I have made. hmm...

One awful place I would be is relaxing every five weeks. I would continue to have limp and overprocessed hair. I would continue to spend nine dollars for a relaxer eleven times out of the year. Also, I would be getting 11 relaxers a year, lol. I would not be prepping my hair for my relaxers at all. I would not know the proper way to relax still. I would be leaving the relaxer on a long time, without caring about the time frames that have been indicated for the different textures of hair. 

I would be flat-ironning my hair two times a week every week. I would continue to blowdry every week. I would still be using no heat protectant. The days that I would feel like I want a little shine to my hair, I would put my heat instruments on hair and heat style with bees wax. My hair would be constantly split due to the enormous amount of heat. I would have to continue to receive frequent trims due to my damaged ends.

I would be trimming every month. Trimming every month has left me at the end of year with the same length of hair that I started the year with. My inability to trim properly has left me with uneven, choppy hair.

I would be still listening to hair myths. "Dandruff means that your hair is growing." "If you trim your hair, your hair will grow faster." "If you stretch your relaxer past 6 weeks, your hair will fall out." "Brushing your hair 100 times a day stimulates growth." "If you leave your hair in a ponytail for so long, your hair will grow." "Grease on the scalp makes hair grow." "If you didn't have long hair when you were a child, you cannot grow your hair long now." "Black women cannot grow long, relaxed hair." Even though I have shown remarkable growth and health in these short years, my family still doubt that I can grow my hair back to WL. I am a journey to prove them all wrong. Women can dream, right? Well, what is wrong with me dreaming? Not only is WL a dream, but it is achievable because I have been there before. Sadly, some of us did not realize the beauty in our hair. Some of us were so quick to cut, color, process our hair where we didn't not appreciate our true beauty. I know I am speaking for myself, and I am paying the price. I am picking up the pieces of what my hair was, LONG. True enough my hair was quite long back in the day, but my hair is at its healthiest right now.

If I wasn't on this healthy hair journey, my hair would have stayed the same length for all of these years. I would probably still be spending countless amount of money on stylists. I would probably still use cotton scarves to tie my hair down with or nothing at all. I would probably still rely on others to relax my hair. I would probably apply heat with not heat protectant. I would have never met any of you wonderful and inspirational ladies.

XOXO

Summer Recap (hair and beyond)

So, I have been doing alot of research about this and that in regards to my hair. Since, I have decided to stay on my HHJ, I made the promise to stay on the most simplistic path possible. Its like Calculus, you think the problem is solved but you have this whole other route you have to take. Yea, I hate math, lol. I do not even know where there analogy came from. What has came over me??? I believe that the summer has officially altered my brain beyond my own comprehension. I have been in this huge slump since returning home.

I was very disappointed that I did not reach BSL when I graduated. Talking about someone who was hurt!!! After I relaxed my hair, straightened my hair, graduated and came home, I really saw my ends for what they really where, THIN! So, this summer I believed that I have cut my hair three times to achieve the maximum amount of bluntness that I could possibly give myself. I am satisfied with what I have right now. I have made a promise not to trim my hair no more this year, I believe that I have cut enough for the next five years. Even though I was upset about not meeting BSL and cutting into my hair so much, I am excited about how my ends look  now.

Another thing that has bother me this entire summer was the fact that I have yet to enjoy my hair. My hair is not at the longest point it has ever been (I was once WL), but it is definitely the thickest it has ever been. Instead of celebrating this fact, I have still worried about protecting my ends and making sure that my clothes will not dry out my ends when I wear my hair down. I was mentioning this with another blogger some days ago. I haven't hit a major landmark in about two or three years, but I should be happy about how thick my hair is. I have decided, despite that I have not met my BSL goal or any other goals, to never put down my hair again. I was so wrapped up in growth, growth, growth to the point where I literally punish myself for failing to meet goals. I have dismissed people's honest-to-heart compliments about my hair because I am not satisfied with my hair. Even though I verbally accepted and appreciated their comments, I was feeling ridiculed on the inside. I think to myself, "Thanks for saying how my hair looks so cute in this style, but I still haven't got my hair to my bra." I have also said in my head, "Oh, thanks for complimenting on how my SHOULDER LENGTH hair looks good, not my ARMPIT LENGTH hair, or my BRA STRAP LENGTH hair." I need help right, lol. People who are about to do HHJs need to be aware of the psychological stress and drama possibilities that could emerge durring one. Isn't that sad, lol?

Another thing is that I have moved back home. UGH :( This is one of the biggest mistakes that I have ever made in my entire life. You know how you take a stroll down memory lane and you remember the old guys in your past and you think to yourself, "Just what in the hell was I thinking?" Yea, as bad as some of my relationships were, I truly believe that moving back home tops the cake. My father is fine. Me and him rarely have issues. BUT there are TWO other people in my household that drives me up a MOFO wall. (I am going to try to keep this post PG-13, but this subject makes my mouth absolutely filthy, lol.) My mother and my brother are hellians. They make me lose my mind. My mom is so unappreciative and she feels like I am supposed to just do everything around the house without the smallest ounce of respect and appreciation. My brother is so g***amn unappreciative. He makes my a** itch. He is 20, and he feels like he is owed everything just because of who he is. He is in community college, but he still does not have any idea what is the value of hard work. The worst part about it is that my mom condones or look over his behavior. I am the type that if I know that my family is doing wrong, I am going to tell you that you are wrong. But he gets so defensive and tells me that I am being nosy, and that I am knocking his "hustle". I don't know what that is. But at the moment me and him are not talking. Me and my mom will have our arguments, too. #frustrating I am 24. I had money saved to get an apartment after graduation; however, my school told me that I was missing a semester worth of classes, my entire savings. So, I am stuck like Chuck. Right now, my plan is to stay in my room and out of anyone's eyesight. I rather be in the room alone than arguing. I do have a small job right now, so I am trying to save as much as I can to be out of here sometime.

My plan was to start grad school last month. However, I only applied to one school and when I did, I was denied. Sad story. Yeah, well that is old news. I have better news. I have been accepted to a different graduate school, and I will start in January. Yay, me!!! I am so excited about this new journey I am about to embark. Is it safe to say that I would love to be WL for this graduation? Hmm? Lol. Idk about it,  but I would love to see.

Since being home, I have also "committed" to the "job" of  "assisting" with the care of my mother's hair. What is with all of the quotes? Well, pretty much I am being forced to take full care of my mother's hair. No, I was not asked. BUT, I rather her hair being taken care of with her hair's health being main priority. Beauty shops around us are not interested in the hair's health, only to get a style in your head, get their money and free their chair for the next client.

This has been my summer: I have put some thought into my HHJ, parents, brother, school, and no full time job. Yep, life is sweet, lol. I am still hopeful though. All of these problems are already solved. I just have to want it bad enough. So, I hope you have enjoyed my summer recap.

Why a Support System Is Sometimes Greatly Needed

Boy, when I first started my HHJ, I had zero supporters. My mom was like, "All of those products are going to make your hair fall out." I didn't have a significant other at the start of it. I was all alone. No one understood what I was going through. A HHJ is hardwork. You want to do right by your hair, but you do not want to get criticized for your beliefs. Boy, does the criticism hurt. Sometimes, it can feel like you and your hair is against the whole world, lol. Well, in December 2008, I decided that I was going to do right by my hair by any means necessary. My mother was one of my biggest critics. She thought I was using too many products at once. I had to cut down on products used, but that is only due to the fact that some things were not working for me. I have thought about giving up this HHJ years before today only because I was not getting any support. In 2010, I got with my boyfriend. He was a critic, too. But I had to plead my case, explain why I was doing all of these different things. Eventually, he became one of my biggest supporters, if not the only one.
Michael is his name and he is one crazy man. He is my constant support. Other than weave, he supports everything else. He has even begin to remind me of my bonnet when I nap and sleep. He can be alittle harsh. I was either Super Mario, Harriet Tubman or Aunt Jemima (the syrup lady) with my bonnet on. LOL. I know there has been two times where he has looked at my hair and told me, "Baby, I love you, but your hair looks a mess." Yes, he has shamed me into cutting two of my stretches short. LOL. I will drag him into BSSs, and I will make mental wish lists of things that I would like to buy. Sometimes, he would buy it for me there. Sometimes, I will have little surprises waiting on me a few days later. You know that you love someone when you see that they are very interested and invested in something and you ask about it, you know, want to learn what makes this and that work. He has began to do that. He wants to know why is this so important to me.

Because he has been so supportive, I have made it my business to do my hair in styles he loves to see me in, WITHOUT DAMAGING MY HAIR, of course. So I have been doing extra research about straight styles and body waves. He loves it, but it is also my way of showing him my appreciation for everything he is to me: physical, mental and emotional support. I even let him rub it and touch it, until I start feeling like a puppy. Then, he has to move. LOL.

Michael has become this awesome addition to my life. It seems like in every aspect of my life, he has a hand in it. The Good, The Bad, The Sad, The Hilarious and The Most Memorable, Michael has been there to support me through it all. He has never left me hanging, except that time he has left me at the Waffle House, LOL. He is always their with a listening ear, until he falls asleep on the phone, LOL.

Yep, Michael has been there through it all. This post has deviated slightly from the topic, but I had to talk about my support system. He is just there for it all, and I wanted to honor him with his own post. I am grateful to have him there by my side.

When I started my HHJ, I had zero supporters. Then, Michael came into the picture, who made up for anyone and everyone. It is hard to say whether my mom supports my HJ or just tolerates it long enough to keep her hair done on a regular basis. IDK. Whatever, it is, I do have one consistent support system. We have been going strong for 30 months. Through it all, I am greatly appreciative. So, thanks, Michael. It has meant alot! I love you!

The Sprush: 1st Review (Mom's Relaxer)

Hello! I wanted to give two reviews on the sprush. The first review will be on my mother's thinner, wavy hair. The second review will be on my thick, curly hair in a few weeks. I want to review how did the sprush mearured up when relaxing both heads.

So, my mother relaxed her hair at six weeks. It is hard to get her to stretch longer than six weeks. She will not stretch longer, so it is very important for me to make sure that I am careful with relaxer applications to avoid overprocessing. It is more than important to be more careful when my mother has little NG after every stretch. My mother had a great deal of NG this stretch due to the JBCO (which we are still using).

These are my sprushes. I bought this 3-pack from Amazon for less than 4 dollars and free shipping!!! Isn't Amazon great? They came just in time because I was ready to try them out as so as I confirmed my order. So I used the smallest one, or the one on the far left, on my mother's hair, just for more precision. While applying the product in, I had to get use to the fact I couldn't gather as much product on the tip like I would with a regular application brush. I got over it pretty quick, applying just enough product on just the right amount of hair. Also, I was getting so close to root without applying anything to the scalp. I do not feel like I saved much time than usually, but I was being extra careful to apply the relaxer with this new instrument so that I will not leave any spots underprocess. However, when it came to smoothing, it was like a dream. I took the sprush and gently smooth in a downward motion. Smoothing did not take long at all, between 2-3 minutes. I was AMAZED at the fact that it was over that quickly.

After my mom rinsed and neutralized her hair, she wanted her gray-coveraged rinse applied in. I decided to use another sprush for this job. I used the middle sprush for the dye job. When I usually do dye jobs, it is very messy. But when I used the sprush, it was quick and alot less messy. Applying it with the sprush was so simple. I was elated.

Both of these processes usually would take me ALL night. I am so thankful for these sprushes because I have saved quite a bit of time. Also, I am not as tired afterwards like I usually be.

So what do I have to say about the sprush?
The sprush is very flexible, allowing for better precision to apply product.
The sprush is very easy to handle.
I believe that it is more precise.
I believe that I was able to avoid overprocessing.
Smoothing time is cut in half.
My mother did NOT HAVE ANY SCALP BURNS.
My mother had alot of product still left in her jar.

I am very neutral about the time to apply the product. It could be me.

All in all, I give this product five stars when dying, four stars when relaxing for the time being. I will review this product again with my relaxer in a few weeks. My hair is way more longer, thicker and more coarse. I believe using the sprush on MY hair will be the deal breaker. My mom and I are extremely pleased with her relaxer results.

I have learned so much with this relaxer. ONE, I am going to make sure my hair is tangle free and combed out, because I want to make sure with my relaxer whether or not I am saving time with application when using the sprush. TWO, when realizing how much product my mom had left over, I believe that I am going to switch from box relaxers to jar relaxers so that I can save more money and more product for another relaxer. I do not save leftover box relaxer.

Sorry that they are no pictures of her hair. She do not know how to used modern technology and my hands were busy. HOWEVER, you should be ready for a heavy pic post when my relaxer day comes. I am going to have all kinds of pix. LOL. So, be on the look out for that post and other posts. I have plenty of draft posts and I am going to posting like crazy for the rest of week.

Happy Reading!!!

Sneak Look at the Store!!!

Hello, loves! I hope everyone has had a wonderful Labor Day. Mines was ok. Did not eat that much. I have been mostly working on my store. I am so excited!!!

I want to announce the new pair of earrings that I have created. These earrings will be available for sale. They are available NOW if you want to shoot me an email about  the following pair or anything else that you are interested in.

I absolutely love these. The studs are 1&1/4 inch in diameter. They will be going for $8. I believe that these are a steal. Years ago, I saw something like this, about this size and with these colors with a different design and they were $40! No thanks!!!

My store is still not available to online shop; HOWEVER, it is online and you can VIEW it! Like I said, the checkout is unavailable right now. BUT if you are interested in anything you can email me.
Here is the website:

http://designersego.bigcartel.com/
It is still in the developing stages, but there it is. September 30th is still the official date where everything should be in working order. If you are interested in anything, please contact me:

alexismoore611@gmail.com

Accessory designing has always been this hobby of mines, and now I get to share the love.

Well, thanks for reading this post and I will see you next time!!!

OH!!! Don't forget to be apart of the GIVEAWAY I am hosting.
Follow this link to the GIVEAWAY and make sure you enter!!! http://lovingthisgirl.blogspot.com/2012/08/giveaway-announcement-click-here-to.html