Due to job interviews, I decided to relax my hair at six weeks. I wanted to look presentable. So I used ORS relaxer. It did not take that well. However I did get a half inch growth. More details to come.
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Monday, June 18, 2012
Why Have I Been This Length Forever?!
I have been armpit length a very long time. It frustrates me because I have been longer. I have tested those waters before. I know what it feels like. I have been there and I would love to be back there. The length I am talking about is waist length. Long years ago, I used to be waist length. However, I wanted to try a short style. So, I had my waist length hair cut to ear length. I felt like I was being compared to a cousin who had hair near my length, but not quite mines. I wanted my own personality. It was fun while it last, but now I want hair.
I have stopped all of my unhealthy habits: flat ironning once a week, washing my hair only one every two months, not using a heat protectant, using cotton scarves at night time, relaxing every five weeks. It was so hard to give up, but I achieved it. But I still suffer from horrible split ends, which causes me to trim excessively throughout the year. I suffer from horrible dry hair, which increases my breakage. I sleep rough which causes me to lose my head coverage at night times. I relax four to five times a year. I trim my hair twice a year. Heat protectant is a must with a once a month heat pass. I use protein when needed, DC when needed. So, why am I still APL? It is completely frustrating. I even take my biotin now. I am hoping for a little something to hold on to this summer. I am stretching until the second week of August. That will put me at 10 weeks. After I get that relaxer, I do believe that I would like to stretch to thanksgiving or christmas. However, my hair not growing is leaving me to the point where I may want to call my HHJ quits. I feel like I already have mentally. My hair is stressing me out. I don't want to be like that. I have other things to worry about and I do not want my hair to add on extra stress that I cannot afford. So, if I quit this journey, what would I do? I don't know. It gets hard to read my hair boards and type this blog when I feel like a failure, hair wise at least. What can I blog about, that my hair is still the same? Honestly, I cannot even tell u if my hair is healthy or not. (sighs) maybe one day...
Is it just me?
I have been deeply considering to cease my entire HHJ. I know one of the main rules of a HHJ is patience, but being APL for two years has made me quite bitter. I know that other ppl would say that it obvious my inability to retain length, but it seems like I can be baby soft with my hair, and still get little to no results. I don't know what to do. I have dreamed about my hair being WL for a future wedding of mines someday, but all I see now is me being APL forever. I am so bored and fed up with length. Yes, I should be grateful for this length. However, I am buying all of these products and not using direct heat like I would want to to no avail. Let's face it: I am discouraged and at the point of just saying forget it. I am not using the products I use to anyway. It almost seem like subconsciously I have already thrown in the towel. I would love to give up today, but I think I am going to give myself to the end of the summer. By then, I know what I will want to do for a fact. It has gotten to the point where I am stressing out about my hair. My hair has become a problem. My hair makes me feel bad about my entire appearance. My hair brings down my mood. It isn't fun anymore. It should not have this negative influence on me, so I know something is going to have to change soon. I don't know if it is the fact that I am home and my folks hate weave to the point where I don't wear any. It frustrates me. But I just don't have the strength to welcome the backlash I would receive if I brought home hair on my head that was not mines. What do you think about this entire thread? Let me know. Who knows? You comment could help me either way. I welcome it all.
Thanks in advance.
Sincerely,
Why do I even bother.
Friday, June 15, 2012
Reviewing A Dark and Lovely Product
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Saturday, June 9, 2012
Please follow my career blog
Hello, followers!!! I have this career blog and I would love some followers.
If you do not mind, please visit this link:
http://immadomeandloveit.blogspot.com/
THANKS!
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What You See Is Far From What You Get
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About Me
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- Alexis The Counselor
- Counselor by day,student by night. I am a substance abuse therapist who is working hard to continue to rise in this field. I am fanatically in love with beautiful things. Follow me as I work hard during the day and play harder after work.